Stop Arguing and Start Understanding

At times it will overwhelm even the best-prepared parent. Child psychiatrist Dave Hall, MD, distills the wisdom, humor, and humility of thirty years work with highly stressed families into eight steps to solving family conflicts.

Step 1
– Accept responsibility to lead your family’s journey to health
Step 2
– Identify the roots of your family’s conflict
Step 3
– Put your own life in order first
Step 4
– Create the family culture you want
Step 5
– Ask for help
Step 6
– Find friends for yourself and your family
Step 7
– Pursue spiritual health
Step 8
– Refuse to give up

Benjamin Franklin Award Gold Medal
“Best first book Non-Fiction by a new publisher”
— Publishers Marketing Association – 2002
    “A beautifully packaged paperback. First rate!”
    “A great self-help – should be on every family bookshelf!”

    — Benjamin Franklin judges
    Parenting Book of the Year Finalist
    ForeWord Magazine – 2001

“Dr. Hall takes his readers on a healing journey and in the process gives them the courage to look at past mistakes without the burden of present guilt. Filled with fresh insights, Stop Arguing and Start Understanding will give anyone who is looking for information or inspiration, the tools to make positive changes in their family relationships.” 
— Elaine Mazlish, co-author of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk and Siblings Without Rivalry.

“Parents can benefit from the wisdom contained throughout the chapters, but professionals who deal with families will find it extremely important. Your case examples really illustrate your points with great sensitivity. I plan to buy a dozen or more to give to my residents as graduation gifts. Congratulations, this is a superb work.” 
​– Clarice Kestenbaum, M.D., President, American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry,, and author/co-editor Handbook of Clinical Assessment of Children and Adolescents 
 “If you are wondering where things went wrong in your family and are serious about wanting to make a change for the better, David Hall’s comprehensive, inspiring guide to solving family conflict can help you create the loving, respectful family you desire.” 
— Laura Davis, author, Becoming the Parent You Want to Be and I Thought We’d Never Speak Again: The Road from Estrangement to Reconciliation 
“Dr. David Hall has provided us with the nearest thing to an “owner’s manual” for the successful operation and maintenance of lasting and loving marriages and family relationships…” 
— John Carr, Ph.D., Prof. Emeritus, Psychology, University of Washington, author/editor of Behavioral Science in the Practice of Medicine 
“Few clinicians are sufficiently skilled to help family members recover from the worst of injuries. Fewer still are those who can distill what they do and write about it in an accessible manner. David Hall has done this and more: he provides a set of tools born of twenty years of medical practice that extends far beyond psychiatry.” 
— John Kydd, MSW, JD, Past President, Association of Family and Conciliation CourtsTestimonials

“The author writes well and fluidly on a subject which should be of interest to millions of families. The amount of research and life experience lessons contained in the book are impressive. [His] expertise and passion for the subject are evident throughout… His ideas are well-explained and well-thought-out, which made this book easy to read… His tips are sound, clear, and helpful; the questionnaire and text boxes made it easy to follow and use.”           — Writer’s Digest​

 “I strongly recommend that school principals, whose offices are filled with struggling families, buy multiple copies of this wonderful new resource for families and give them out with confidence….knowing that they are giving a great gift on behalf of children.” 
​– John Morefield, career elementary principal and teacher of principals at the Danforth Principal Preparation Program at the University of Washington

​”This is a gem of a book. Clear, readable. A kind, wise and practical guide for any parent who wants to raise a healthy family. We recommend it for all parents.” 
— Harville Hendrix, Ph. D. and Helen LaKelly Hunt, M.A. M.Ph , co-authors of Giving the Love That Heals: A Guide for Parents